Tuesday, June 15, 2010


I am considering taking up yoga again after been sidelined by two knee surgeries and arthritic pain. I must confess that I am also interested in maintaining a youthful appearance and in anything that gives me an edge.

I have taken ballroom dancing, tennis, badminton, group aerobic exercise, swimming, yoga, tai chi, and even djembe classes; however, I am hopeless at every one of these. I have since turned to regular acupuncture. One might conclude that I am just searching for the fountain of youth, but Ha! I live in America, the country, or culture, where everything, and everyone, is youth oriented.

When I came across the advertisement for “Kangen Bottled Water” in a yoga pamphlet, it immediately caught my attention. After all, these are health fanatics, and are only interested in strengthening body and mind, so I thought. The ad stated that “Kangen” would slow down the aging process, increase the absorption of important vitamins and minerals, and promote healthy weight loss. This is exactly what I needed.

Believe me, I am not keen on drinking water. Growing up in the islands, it was a constant challenge to find unpolluted water sources. All our drinking water had mosquito larvae and water bugs dancing in it. Given all the benefits of the Kangen water, I put aside my long-held aversion.

I might have an open-mind, but experience has taught me to research any new idea or product before fully embracing it. In my research on Kangen, I discovered that it is a new water purification system from Japan. This “revolutionary” water technology turns acidic, contaminated, and chlorinated tap water into healthier alkaline water.

The whole thing unraveled for me when I found out that Kangen is really a multi-level-marketing business. I came out on the losing end of quite a few of these schemes. In fact, over twenty-five years ago, a similar business duped me. It was a portable water purification container that filtered all impurities from any tap water. The more people one brought into the business, the greater the opportunity for turning a profit. I carried the container with me everywhere, but could not even convince my co-workers to buy one.

Then there was the vitamin scheme to which my doctor introduced me. I went in for my arthritic shoulder and allergies and left with a multi-level marketing vitamin business. I only had to enroll a few people “downstream” from me and success was inevitable: the “American Dream.” I ended up taking all the vitamins myself.

At this point, I became outraged at the yoga club for offering to sell the fountain of youth in the form of a multi-level marketing water purification system. Give me a break! As free spending Americans, we love to try new innovative products and technologies. Admittedly, I am more Americanized than I want to be in this regard, but there is a limit. I will not totally submerge myself in this consumerist culture of eternal youth.

All I want to do is find a great yoga class where the instructors stick to teaching stretches and relaxation. And I will drink from my eco-friendly, BPA-free, stainless steel water bottle, with water drawn from my counter tap, filtered by my American Reverse Osmosis System under my sink.

© 2010 Mouth Wired Shut

No comments:

Post a Comment